M2.Poe+Parody

Hansel and Gretel And The Unexpected Matt Haste English 11 Mrs. Szymczak It was a dark and stormy night. I heard the crash of thunder when Hansel breaks a piece of the chocolate wall off. He shoves it into his mouth. They were starving so they ate pieces of the cottage. They gnawed away at the plaster. Then the door swings open, and hits them both in the head all puffed and red. Well, well seas the old old woman having a look to kill someone. “Come in, welcome to my house you little children. Help yourself to anything you want!” The children eat and eat they cannot see their feet. Then the old, old witch with black dirty teeth takes Hansel over to the closet. “Can you reach up high for that Jolly Rancher, dear boy?” “I think I see it way far away in the back.” With that the old old woman with a black tooth grin pushed Hansel into the closet and locked him away. About that time the microwave buzzes. The witch runs over and Gretel pushed the witch’s head with her huge black tooth into the microwave and slams the door shut. Gretel turns the power on to 100% for 25 minutes. The microwave begins to hiss and siss. Then Gretel grabs the closet key from the witch’s pocket and unlocks the closet. Hansel and Gretel grab lots of grub for a feast. They run home with their food and with lots of laughter live happily ever after.